I'm gonna post a proof, and hopefully it actually becomes a proof because I'm just making it up as I go and I promised myself I would post whatever I came up with. I promise, there will be useless branches of thought that I abandoned and didn't delete before posting this.
Here goes nothing . . .
First we need to define our variables:
For the FSM, we will use the Unicode symbol* '⍾', because it looks quite a bit like Him of the starchiest noodles, extending two appendages from His jiggly mass downward, probably to push us down in an attempt to keep us short . . . but I digress. The point is ⍾=the FSM.
'K' will be knowledge.
'M' will be money.
'B' (for brain) will be intelligence.
'P' will be power.
'a' will mean, "all of". So ax=all of x.
'e' will mean, "existence of". So ex=true means that the existence of x is true, or in other words, that x exists.
'¢' will mean, "attention capacity of". So '¢⍾' means, "attention capacity of the FSM".
'W' will be work.
'⌛' will be time.
Now our proof begins:
Fact I: We all know that knowledge is power. So K=P.
Fact II: Engineers know that power is work over time. So P=W/⌛.
Deduction I: With Fact I and Fact II, and by using substitution, we know that K=W/⌛. So knowledge is work over time.
Deduction II: The more knowledge you have, the less ⌛ you have and the more work you do. Another way of putting it is that the less work you do and the more ⌛ you have, the smarter you are.
Fact III: We know that time is money. So ⌛=M.
Deduction III: From Fact I, Fact II, and Fact III, and also by using substitution, K=W/M.
Deduction IV: Putting Deduction III in words, K=W/M means that the more work you do and the less money you have, the smarter you are. Or, the more money you have and the less work you do, the less smart you are.
Fact IV: We already know that the FSM is an UD, or unintelligent designer.
Deduction V: From Fact IV, we can deduce that the FSM's intelligence is low.
Fact V: Intelligence and knowledge are two very different things.
Deduction VI: B≠K.
Fact VI: The FSM is not all-knowing, and in fact is limited by His attention (besides, knowing all the embarrassing details of every human's life would make Him very uncomfortable around us mortals. Some things are best kept secret).
Deduction VII: His K is a factor of His attention span and ⌛.
Fact VII: We know the FSM is affected by ⌛, or at least that He chooses to be affected by ⌛, because of His past use of relativity. Also, He would likely find it very boring just sitting around in a time stop, in the case the He did choose to be affected by ⌛.
Fact VIII: Technology requires power to function.
Fact IX: Technology exists.
Fact X: The FSM took a bit under five days to create the universe as we know it.
Deduction VIII: Based on Fact VII and Fact X, we can safely deduce that His power has some sort of limit that is related to ⌛ (perhaps using His almighty majesty to work wonders gives Him severe migraine when He uses it all at once, we cannot know).
Deduction IX: From Deduction VIII, we can safely deduce that ⍾≠aP.
Deduction X: From Fact I, Deduction IX, and by using substitution, we can calculate that ⍾≠aK. This supports and in fact mathematically and logically proves Fact VI.
Deduction XI: By switching over to Boolean states of existence, and by using Fact VIII and Fact IX, we can make a firm statement that eP=true.
Deduction XII: By again using Boolean states of existence, let us assume that the FSM exists (we know this, but others refuse to or cannot see the truth). Therefore, e⍾=true.
Fact XI: We know that the FSM has power, but yet is not all-powerful.
Deduction XIII: From Deduction XI, Deduction XII, and Fact XI, we can say that as long as e⍾=true and eP=true, and because ⍾<aP, then ⍾=P (because He has power).
Fact XII: Booleans are not like variables when it comes to substitution.
Deduction XIV: Based on Fact XII, we cannot conclude that, by using substitution and Deduction XIII, that e⍾=eP.
Deduction XV: Based on Fact XII, we can conclude that I'm going to need a workaround to prove the conclusion I've already reached (Pastafarian scientific method is the best scientific method, after all).
Deduction XVI: From Deduction XIII, if ⍾=P because He has power, then multiplying both sides by 'e' should give us a true statement. This statement is e⍾=eP.
Fact XIII: I am currently typing this proof on an electrically-powered piece of equipment that is an instance of modern, electrically-powered technology.
Deduction XVII: Deduction XVI implies that there is a relationship between the existence of P and the existence of ⍾.
Deduction XVIII: From Deduction XVII, Fact VIII, Fact IX, and logical reasoning, we can draw the conclusion that modern, electrically powered technology could not exist without power, and that if power does not exist, then the FSM does not exist.
Deduction XIX From Fact VIII, Fact IX, and Fact XIII, we can correctly hypothesize that both technology and, in turn and by necessity, power exists.
Fact XIX: Because e⍾=eP, and power was proven to exist in Deduction XIX, the FSM must also exist (as if we didn't already know that).
That's all for now.
This indecipherable list of proofs will later be unscrambled and posted as separate strings of thought. But not now, not yet . . . patience, and stay thirsty my friends . . .
*Random thought I had: is there a Unicode symbol that stands for Unicode? There should be.
resent the FSM, we will use the Unicode symbol '⍾', because it looks quite a bit like Him of The Sauciest And Meatiest Balls, extending two appendages from His jiggly mass downward, pr 
