The Official Loose Canon Thread (Submissions and Business)

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Nef Yoo n:n.n

An da Goodshup Lollypup waz floatin onna stwangely carm see ,
ummmmmm........ it b carm assep 4 alla wayves maded by da rollickin' varmints inna bilj !
An da winz woz stopt ,
an da wain wos stopt ,
butt dare stil b lotsa wotterr effry-wear .

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

nef yoo n:n.n

Oh den nef yoo senze owt a cwow 2 look 4 dwy lann ,
butt da sneekie blaggarrrd nicks off
an Nef yoo ses "dat li'l' blaggarrd 'e juss nikkt offt" !

Soh den nef Yoo chuks 'is pet struthidea inta da air ,
cos da struthidia b tha twusswurvy birdie ,
an she did fwy a weigh ta look 4 dwy lann ,
an she did cum bak wiff a leef in 'er teef ,
an Nef yoo nose dare muss b lann sumwear
cos twees not gwow unner wotterr , rrrrrrrrr .

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Nef yoO n:n.n

An Nef Yoo fines da lann
cos 'e b da bery clefferr pyrate ,
an 'e telld dem aminals wot b livin' inna bilj
day haffta go weigh .
An nef yoo commans dem an sayd
"get offa me skiff ya scurvee currrs" ,
an all aminals day dunn wot nef yoo sayed ,
rrrrrrrrrrrrr .

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Ummm........

Hokay

nef Yoo n:n.n

Ummm... an da Fwyin Spagette Moster lookt doun onna whorll
an 'E sore dat alla critter 'ad goan fourff an made mere bebies ,
an it b gude ,
An 'E did sea da mitey pyrit NYBB
maeks 'is hoam onna wayves off da see ,
ummmmmm............ an 'E b soooo berry 'appy wiff Nef Yoo
dat 'E maeks 'im commaner off da intyre fleet !

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

neF yoO n:n.n

Yup !
Nef yoo b da commanderer offa da intyre fleet !

An an an evabuddy b bery bery 'appy
an day maeks a big partee 4 Nef Yoo ,
an day giffs Nef Yoo lotsa yummy fings ta eet
an speshul yummy dwinks an sech .
An Nef yoo sayd "fank ye ye welkum" !
Rrrrrrrrrrramen .

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

AHOY !

Ditt i effa tels ye a bowt li'l' bebee Nef yoo inna baginin ?

Duss ye wonna no wot 'append ?

Ummm.... ef ye b good i tels ya .

Et b a long , long tyme a go............

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

R ye awl lissnen ?

neF Yoo n:n.n

Umm... inna wun off dem uffer baginins it woss a tyme off tewwabull confwickt an term-oil ,
da hole worll woss wuled bi da meen , beestlee an tewwabull tye-rant
hoo woss makin effabuddy wurk bery bery hard 4 nuffin .
An da bad wuler nose alla peepulls not wont 'im 4 king
b coz dem sillee peepulls alla yelld owt "we wan Nef Yoo ta b king" .
Butt wot cood Nef yoo do ,
'e woss juss a tyney liddel bebee ?

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Nef Yoo n:n.n

At furss da ebil kink didn't no wot ta do .
'E didn't no wear Nef Yoo liffed ,
'e didn't so much as 'ave nef yoo's fone numba .
An den dat bad kink sed "i goddit ! I juss hafta smite
alla kiddies inna intyre worll .
Yup , iff i smites alla kiddies inna intyre worll
Nef Yoo is shore ta b won off dem" .
Ohhhhhhhhhh Noooooooooo !

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Nef ooY n:n.n

Butt nef yoo woss a bery bery clefferr bebee
an 'e did 'ear off da efil kink's terrabull plot ,
an 'e ordered hiss muffer ta maek 'im a liddel reed bote , rrrrr
an 'e calldit da "Goodship Lollypop"
an 'e telld 'er ta lern alla dem uffer muffers
2 maek liddel read botes 4 dere kiddies 2 .
An alla da muffers dey dun wot nef yoo's mummy sed ,
den dey placed dere bebees onna weed botes
an set dem adwiff onna big riffer , rrrrrrrrrrrr.

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Hokay

Now den ,

Nef yoo n:n.n

Alla bebees woss cwyin an hollerin ,
dey woss awl bery bery fritend ,
ummm , awl assep nef yoo coz 'e woss not fritend off
enybuddy oar enyfing , rrrrrrr ,
an 'e ordered alla kiddies ta stopt dere yellerin
an dey dunnit cos dey respeck nef yoo , rrrrrrr .
Den Nef yoo tyed alla liddel botes 2geffer
an 'e set sail down riffer wiff hiss flotilla in toe .

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Nef Yoo n:n.n

An den sum prinsesse standin onna shoar bellowd owt ,
"NEF YOO , NEF YOO , ya bedda keep goin' ..........
da kink nose ya got alla dem bebees .........
an 'e mite suspeck a fib iff i tells 'im dey awl b mine" .
An da mitey NYBB sayd "hokay"
an 'e sailed on frew da delta
wiff alla da kings chariots an soljurrs in hot purrsuit .
Ohhhhhhhhhh Nooooooooooooo !

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Nef yoo n:n.n

Nef yoo proofed ta b a superb sailarr , rrrrr ,
an 'e keept juss a-hed off da effil kink's armee , rrrrr .
A-venchalee da flowtiller reeched an cwossed da Reed See
An da soljurrs reeleyesd dey cuddint follo
an dey cwied owt in unison ,
"Nef Yoo , can we cum wiff yoo ?
iff we goes bak dat effil kink will smite us awl" ,
an Nef yoo sayd "hokay den" .

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

neF Yoo n:n.n

So Nef yoo commans da wotarr
an , an , an da wottarr duz reseed , rrrrrrrrrr ,
an da kink's intyre armee defecks safewy 2 nef yoo's side ,
an da wotterr cwoses b hine dem .
An alla armee peepulls sayd
"hail Nef yoo , hail nef Yoo , hail nef yoo"

an dey trewly b cum Nef Yoo's frends
an dey looks arfa alla bebees an maeks dem supparr an sech , rrrrrrr.

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Ummmmmm........

nef Yoo n:n.n

An da Fwyin Spagety Moster woss so bery 'appy wiff Nef yoo b-coz nobuddy wus smited ,
So 'E camoonicated wiff nef Yoo via a specter ov smokin' shrubbery ,

An 'E giffs nef yoo a gifft ova da 8 "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts"
Dat 'E strukct onta stoan tablitts .
Butt NYBB piffed dem an sayd
"dey's bery heffy Unca Fryin , i not superman .

Carnt ya sea i iss juss a liddel bebee ?
Can ye send dem 2 me i-fone insted" ?
An da FSM obliged ........
An Nef Yoo did upload "The Law" onta da intanet .
An dat's how da 8 "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts"
Caem ta b onna yore tablets 2-day .
Fank ye , ye welcum !
[R]Amenhotep4 , NYBB .