â€œThose who have no faith in me, should stay with their pizzas and burgers and become fat and ugly until their own dogs look away in disgust.â€
â€œIf your enemy insults you, donâ€™t waste the holy tomatosauce by throwing it at your enemy â€“ instead offer to eat from the same plate and your enemy will become your bestest friend.â€
"Only those who understand the meaning of "al dente" are ready to devour the true spirit of the noodly one."
"A proper tomato sauce takes fairly an hour, but it doesn't get any better if cooked longer."
"Those who think beer goes along well enough with the noodly dish have never tried a glass of red whine."
Am I chosen? Should I start lecturing? How can I be sure that the FSM spoke to me?
Submit your scriptural writings for inclusion in the Loose Canon, and your tales of ancient FSM Lore, as well as any other FSM-related writing you may have.
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