Methinks a more gospelly Gospel should be made

[TheWikidFool]

Despite Prophet Bobby's brilliant writing, the part that most resembles an actual gospel seems to have been an afterthought. I mean, how can we reference various sections of the story of the creation and Cap'n Mosey without handy dandy numbered verses like its bestselling rival?

I suggest a more official text delving into a linguistically complex (gratuitous use of thou, ye, behold, shalt, etc.) and historically accurate*cough cough* account of how stuff happened. I bet if we searched history, we could find more events strikingly similar to Christian affairs that we're incited by the Noodly Father.

Just a thought; it just seems that our gospel isn't much of a gospel. Plus I'm bored.

Though since I'm not a prophet I would not consider it a gospel but I am writing a book considering my veiws of Him.

[SouthernTwilight]

I agree, just like any other religion we must have hardcore books. But unlike christianity and other religions, we won't make up fictional stories and myths, because we all know that would disrespect the FSM and he will find all the more reason to burn us up in global warming. We must respect the FSM by writing and researching much about him, including poetry, prayers, quotes, and historical stories like the bible has. Also, morals, values, etc just like other religions establish. I never got this gospel yet, but i plan to. But i've heard that it wasn't that fullfilling, which is why I am offering to help organize and write a more filled book packed with stuff that would kick the ass of every other religion.

Please if anyone is really putting this together inform me so i can help

We must be legit and establish ourselves in writing. I am a good writer too, just to point out. But if nobody really cares that much then I won't care either. Or if someone has already done this please tell me so i can get both the gospel and the new writings.

Also, before I buy the gospel, can anyone give me a general understanding of what it includes?

[BordusiusIV]

Why does bobby say in his letter that we have numerous text , if there is only one book in existance. He may be hiding other holly scriptures, possably in a chest, burried on the shore of Porta Bella where numerous pirate breathern have known to base their operations. Blatenly placing the scriptures there would be the best place to hide them.

But this is just nonsens folks! Everyone knows that the christians, muslims and Jews all worship the True Lord FSM, they just dont know about it. If we pick and choose from all the religions we can find many things that has been placed there to confuse and annoy people of the wrong faiths (christianity, islam and the rest).

[DancingKitty]

Quoted for a reminder to anyone wanting to Wiki on...

There was a massive effort by a number of former members to do exactly that, to make an ongoing compilation of the writings of the membership as the FSM revealed his messages to them.

There was even a website set to make it look all 'traditional' gospel-ish. Lots of long hours were spent trying to get it into Wiki form, when Bobby chose to say that was what he wanted. The main person working on it, who spent hours every day reading every post, back when the forum was extremely busy was threatened, by Bobby, with a lawsuit. She chose to leave, blaming it an health problems, and refuses any extended contact with any members or former members to this day. the other person that was helping her and donating the bandwidth to store the 'artistic' archives was also unwell, and the threats nearly caused another major bout of illness for her.

Anything you do, try to clear with Bobby first, because you don't want to waste months and months executing a document and get threatened for it. That's what was done the first time, but that was when Bobby wasn't communicating.

The majority of the previous work and the source documents are gone.

[DancingKitty]

Also, before I buy the gospel, can anyone give me a general understanding of what it includes?

You don't want to know...

[Tigger_the_Wing]

Also, before I buy the gospel, can anyone give me a general understanding of what it includes?

You don't want to know...

That's a shame, because the copy I ordered has arrived at the bookshop.

Did you really mean that we don't want to know? Or just that we don't want to know in advance?

[Platypus Enthusiast]

Quoted for a reminder to anyone wanting to Wiki on...

There was a massive effort by a number of former members to do exactly that, to make an ongoing compilation of the writings of the membership as the FSM revealed his messages to them.

There was even a website set to make it look all 'traditional' gospel-ish. Lots of long hours were spent trying to get it into Wiki form, when Bobby chose to say that was what he wanted. The main person working on it, who spent hours every day reading every post, back when the forum was extremely busy was threatened, by Bobby, with a lawsuit. She chose to leave, blaming it an health problems, and refuses any extended contact with any members or former members to this day. the other person that was helping her and donating the bandwidth to store the 'artistic' archives was also unwell, and the threats nearly caused another major bout of illness for her.

Anything you do, try to clear with Bobby first, because you don't want to waste months and months executing a document and get threatened for it. That's what was done the first time, but that was when Bobby wasn't communicating.

The majority of the previous work and the source documents are gone.

As the new head of the Loose Canon project, I'm a little curious about where you're getting this information. I've found pretty much all there could be of the original scripture in the old posts and I have the link to the outside source, the gospel-ish website you mentioned. I had heard about health problems and disappearance of the ancient scribes, but I'd never heard anything about a lawsuit. Were you involved with the project back then? Do you know what the legal pretext of the lawsuit was? Cause I figure if the authors of the material give consent and no profit is made off the Loose Canon, there's not really any way Bobby could sue, that is if he even wanted to. Doesn't seem like his style.

[Warlord of Elephants]

Also, before I buy the gospel, can anyone give me a general understanding of what it includes?

You don't want to know...

I rather enjoyed my copy, have gotten several friends to buy it. Sin. WoE.

[Linguini-Luigi]

It would be quite cool to have a proper gospel. the old testicle could have the stories of Pirate Moesy plus other things which could be taken from the folklore section. we could have everyone write a story and the really good ones could be put into a book. The new testicle could have all the writings of our dear prophed Bobby and describe his story. it coud include the current gospel. It should have chapters like 'Sauce' and 'Piraticus' and 'Parmisan' so we could say thing like

''and so the pirates saw that the pasta was under-cooked and they wept for shame that they has spoiled his noodlyness' image.' Sauce 3:9-11

RAmen

[Deftera]

I agree. I've literally read that noodledamned Holy Noodle half a dozen times now. The rest of the book's still funny but nothing compares to His word

[KMill]

It should have chapters like 'Sauce' and 'Piraticus' and 'Parmisan' so we could say thing like

''and so the pirates saw that the pasta was under-cooked and they wept for shame that they has spoiled his noodlyness' image.' Sauce 3:9-11

Fo' shizzle! The apocalypse should be detailed in Raviolations...

[Dudeman55556]

It should have chapters like 'Sauce' and 'Piraticus' and 'Parmisan' so we could say thing like

''and so the pirates saw that the pasta was under-cooked and they wept for shame that they has spoiled his noodlyness' image.' Sauce 3:9-11

Fo' shizzle! The apocalypse should be detailed in Raviolations...

Of course. But who's going to be the Jesus figure?

[Platypus Enthusiast]

It should have chapters like 'Sauce' and 'Piraticus' and 'Parmisan' so we could say thing like

''and so the pirates saw that the pasta was under-cooked and they wept for shame that they has spoiled his noodlyness' image.' Sauce 3:9-11

Fo' shizzle! The apocalypse should be detailed in Raviolations...

Of course. But who's going to be the Jesus figure?

Teeny Houdini, the midget magician?

[Reverend RA]

The Great Book has inspired me all my working life. However I have always been intrigued by Piraticus 13:7 - In the beginning was the word and the word was "Arrrgh!". I would dearly love to read the preceeding verses and hope the Profit finds it in his wisdom (or sobers up enough) to produce an unabridged version of the full scriptures.

[Pirate Cho]

I concur with the prospect of a Gospel 2, Al dente.

Maybe have some gospels from people who have been touched by his noodly appendage, i.e. If someone finds a statue or something that resembles the FSM or a Pirate fish, they could write about how they stumbled across the sign from FSM.

Also do we have an Anti-christ, like and Anti-Pasto?