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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Fri Oct 02, 2015 8:40 pm

Georgya pwayed New Zeelann at Carduff yesserday an’ as pwedikted , da haka hollerin’ hooers wun (43-10) . I fink dem Georgy pwayers iss pwetty dum reely , struttin’ abowt arffa da gaem congratchewlatin’ eech uffer . Ummmm..... hullo darrlings ! Too poot it inna perspecktiv 4 ye , da Awl Bwakks juss frashed yoo an’ dey mooff inta da cawta finals .

In uffer gaems da Frenchies winns a genst Cannadia an' Wails beet Fuji . Da Fuji Pwime Monster sayd "ït juss wossent fare , dem wed dwagons awl twied rrreely harrd" . No matterrr how much Mista Fwank Barny Amore offerred dem dey woodent rroll ober an' noaw he hass lodgd a extradishen orda 4 da intyre Wails sqwad . Meenwile da Cannadia guvvamint hass depawted harf off dere teem to Fwance . Ummmm....., da sillee dufferrs shood áve dun dat b4 thee gaem , rrrrr .

Fankye , ye welkum !
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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Sat Oct 03, 2015 4:18 am

NUWS FWASH

Hawforn winz da Astraylyun Footbrawl Leegue gwann fynal in Melborn beeting Wess Coest Eggles by lots an' lots . By poplar a claim Cyril Rioli woss da bess pwayer onna gwound . Alla Wess Astraylyuns wiwwl b bery glum tonite . Neffer mind , dey wiwwl get oafer it . Carn da HAWKS !

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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Sat Oct 03, 2015 5:50 pm

WUGBY WORLL CUP UPDAET

Formerr Egglann coatch , Mr Woodhead , ahkewsed da Straylyun wugy teem ov beeinn dum-clukks , finkin’ dat mite pway onna dere minds . Ummmm.... hullo Mr Woodenbranes , dats peecisely yyy mined gaems do’nt werk on dem . Da Straylyun coatch , Micull Chekka , sayd hiss teem iss inna purrfekt state ov bliss – “da boys iss sooo stewpid dat dey do,nt feal eny pane an’ dat werks in our fayverr” . Mr Chekka indykated his teem wozzent cumpleetly stewpid in eny case an’ projewsed doccamints shoawin’ dey ád a cumbyned IQ onwy slitely less dan Einstein’s . We noat dat 60% ov dat scoar woss hiss oan . Enyway , da Straylyuns ’ad da larss larf coz dey beet Egglann bi 33 fings too 13 . Arksed arffurr da gaem iff eny Straylyun pwayer wood get a gurnsey in da Egglann sqwad Mr Woodhed moddarrated hiss posishun slitely an’ sayd “maybee Willy Skeleton butt furrst he kneads 2 poot sum meet on hiss fraeme” .

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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Sat Oct 03, 2015 8:39 pm

MOAR ONNA WUGBY

At da Old Cassel larss nite dem Spinbukks woss to gude 4 Scothlann an’ beeted dem 34 -16 . Da Souf Afrikken caoch , Hayneck Mewer , lykes 2 b da unner dawg , soh reed diss yew scurvee blagggarrd , ye iss pwaying reel gude noaw go weigh an' loose 2 da Merrycans , dats a oardarrrr . Ass 4 da Scotchies , ye got wun larse woll off da dyce . Ya godda beet Smoa ann ye nead dem SpingBooks two loose . I reccamenn Uncca Woy tawks too Verrrn Kotterrerrr ass soon ass possibull . Tells ím 2 nobble too Souf Afrikkans , Ham Burger an’ Bethany Esteb soh dat Skottslann hass a fyten chanse 2 reech da qwarta fynals .

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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:14 pm

Worll Cup Wugbee

Laiderr diss weak Wails iss skedjewelled 2 pway Straylia inna da larss off da Grope A poole matchurs . Straylya hurtin’ coz Hoopa bean spended 4 bein norty ann Issrail Fowl godda saw hoof witch giffs Wails sum chancers off winnin . I fink Straylya mite gunna wakk Darth Gravies an’ Maffyew Moreguns errlee inna gaem an’ wiwl beet da rred dwaggonns eezee . Ummm.... seams lyke Straylya nott b fwying unner da rraydarr enymoar , rrrrrr .

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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Wed Oct 07, 2015 8:11 pm

Souf Africca frashes Merrycar

Oi kin skarsely b leeve wot juss append inna Lundun larss nite . Arffa alla mi currygmint 2 fyer hup da Merrycans wot did dey doo ? Ummm.... , inna ansir 2 my most serial qwestun , teem USA compwetely hignored mi hadvice án let Souf Afrikka winz by 64 too nuffin ! Wile da Merrycans paintd dere nales an’ pwayed hookey inna chainge rroom , da SpinBokks did azaccily wot dey lyked onna feeld scoaring 9 twies an’ 7 uffer fings . Oi fink oi juss waisted my breff on dem .

Wugby Worrll Cup Weportererr
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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Wed Oct 07, 2015 10:51 pm

Egglann Flip Owt

I fink da Egglann coatch hass dunn a marvluss job ov holden da teem in gude sted wecentlee , awl-b-it unner tryin cundishuns . Dat beeinn sed , mi cat mite haff dunn slitely bedderer but é iss x-streemly cleffer an’ by no meens do i in tend 2 b littel da effits off da grate Egglishmon . Deese r difficult tymes , 4 egg zample , da food woss crap at Pennyhill an’ dey maek sum sillee sleccshun miss takes (lyke alla tyme) . Noaw , ye juss hafta giff it yer bess shot agenst Youraguy an’ den we seas yew awl at da nex worll cup chaps .

Diss b rit by yoor worll cup wugby wepawterer
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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Sat Oct 10, 2015 3:46 pm

Straylya Tops Poowl A

Straylya tops Poowl A bi winnin dere macht agenst Whales yesserday , 15-6 . Ass da scoar line hindicaytes , thee gaem was a tuff arm wessell . Bess pwayer 4 Wails woss Scot Hairloss an’ 4 da Ossies Able Digmore did sum twikky stuff , yar . Awl tho boaf teems go frew 2 da cawter fynals , Strayya urns da eesyer woute wile poor ol’ Wails godda fase dem cocky Souf Afrikkanz . Taek noat Haynekk Mower , ye iss’nt thee unner dawg eny moore , an’ wee awl wonna sea Whales giff ye scurvy curs a hyding - nobuddy lykes yoo noaw go weigh . Inna da Grope B macht , Scotchlann scwaped hoam agenst Smoa (36-33) an’ soh pway da Ossies onna Sundy week . O well , i fink dat mite spel da end off da penny-sectchin 4 Scotchlands .

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Roy Hunter
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Re: Sports

Postby Roy Hunter » Sat Oct 10, 2015 4:56 pm

[Mod note - somebody remind me to make sure that Scotland wins the World Championship, at least as far as this Sports thread is concerned.
Thanks, your impartial and disinterested Admin.]
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Re: Sports

Postby PKMKII » Sun Oct 11, 2015 9:15 pm

"How is it that hardly any major religion has looked at science and concluded, 'This is better than we thought! The Universe is much bigger than our prophets said, grander, more subtle, more elegant. God must be even greater than we dreamed'? Instead they say, 'No, no, no! My god is a little god, and I want him to stay that way.'" - Carl Sagan

"To doubt everything or to believe everything are two equally convenient solutions; both dispense with the necessity of reflection." - Henri Poincaré

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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Tue Oct 13, 2015 5:55 pm

Roy Hunter wrote:[Mod note - somebody remind me to make sure that Scotland wins the World Championship, at least as far as this Sports thread is concerned.
Thanks, your impartial and disinterested Admin.]


Scotch Fans Poized 2 Win

In wecent avents at da Wugby Wurll Cup da gween mersheen reely fryd da Frenchies . Fwance mite ass wel go hoam noaw coz dey not gunna beet Nuw Zoolann , um , but Islann pwayin’ reel gude an’ it mite b wurf wotchin dem pway Argntinea inna furd courta fynal . Wails godda pway Souf A Fricca an’ we awl wont da wed dwaggons 2 belt dem hup gude an’ propparrrrrr . Scotchlann iss gunna loose da fourf cawta fynal but it duzzent mattar Unca Woy , da Wollerbees teem iss awl Scotchmans enyway . A breef look at da Wollerbees lisst shoze it bwimming wiff gude Scottiss names: Sean McMahon, Ben McCalman, Rob Simmons, Scott Fardy, Kane Douglas, Matt Toomua, Tatafu Polota-Nau, Tevita Kuridrani, Sekope Kepu, Israel Folau, Wycliff Palu - an’ da liss goze on an' on . Bakk a winna , Skotish fans r defekting 2 da Wollerbees bannerr in dere fowsands .

Fankye , ye welcum !
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Re: Sports

Postby Roy Hunter » Wed Oct 14, 2015 4:01 am

Scotland forwards Ross Ford and Jonny Gray suspended for three weeks, miss the rest of the World Cup.

Apparently Samoa don't consider Rugby to be a contact sport, and complained to their mummy that Scotland were playing too rough.
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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Wed Oct 14, 2015 8:42 pm

SPESHULL NOWNSMENT

Supa Bykes Worll ChampyunShips iss on at Fillip Islann (Astraylya) diss cummin Sundy .

Dere are too avents:

250cc Moto3 GP

1000cc Supa Bykes

Wotch owt 4 da Astraylyun Wild Card entrant , MATT BARTON , compeeting inna 250cc avent .

Heers da tip , Matt iss sensayshunnel . Rememmer , yoo herd it heer firsst .

Yoor Rroving Spoorts Weporterer
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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Sat Oct 17, 2015 6:11 pm

Furss 2 Cawta Fynal Wesults

Az surgested , da Frenchies shood haff goan óme b 4 dere qorta final b coz Now Zoolann frashed dem reel gude , 62 – 13 . Noo Zeelann caoch , Mista Steev Handsum , waised sum eyebwows wen é dead-a-kated da win 2 thee Wainbow Wurryer deseesed peepulls . Mista Handson added “we learned dem Froggies a lessen 4 lettin alla dere adam boms off inna da Souf Specific”. In da uvver gaem da Sprigg Buks scwaped hoam aginst a crageous Wails hoo leff thee park wiff no wegrrets . Souf A Fricca noaw fase da Bwakk Ferns in da furss semmy fynal coz da NZ mens teem iss bean ressted . Yoo shood b wurryd Mista Hayneck Mower , New Zeelannn chicks r scarey az hell . :antipasta:

Repawt rit bi
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Re: Sports

Postby Nef Yoo BlackBeard » Mon Oct 19, 2015 3:48 am

Furd an' Forf Cawta Fynals

Inna da fird cawta final on Sundy Argentinea pwoved two gude for da gween mersheen , beetin’ dem 43 - 20. Islann did’nt maek eny scuses 4 dere lost but i fink pwayin wiffowt dere captin (Oh Connoll) an’ da spearyenced Jonny Sextoy hert dem bad . Eny way , wel dunn 2 da Pewmas , but ye godda loose da semmy fynal , hokay ?

But off cawse da clohse gaem woss bee tween da Wollerbees an’ da Scotchies , da final scaw deesided by a contavershull larss minnit pennaltee . Da reffree woss da flaver off da mowmennt an’ Scottiss fans gifft ím fwee dwinks ass é leff da feeld . A ellyqwent Ossie captin sayed arfa thee gaem “it woss a gude gaem . Scotchlann pwayed reel gude”. Dat fishwife wooman , wots ‘er name , um , Nikkola Sturgin , woss not áppy . She sum hup da mood wen she sayd “we awl no Scotchlann reely wind diss gaem”. (Nef Yoo finks it lukky da Wollerbees rrr da seckond Scottiss teem .)

Fank ye , ye welcum !
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