Portsmouth News at Ten

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black bart
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Portsmouth News at Ten

Postby black bart » Mon Jul 23, 2007 2:50 pm

...and now the Portsmouth News at Ten headlines, read by Trevor McBlack Bart

Dongggggg (sound of ship's bell instead of Big ben)

AARRRR...Heavy floodin in the South an West of England...a chance ta plunder further inland lads!

Dongggggg

"Green" Cap'n Smith sais: "I told ye so"

Dongggggg

"Killer Barnacles a hoax," claim Shellfish Police

Dongggggg

Missing Spitoones, is Oz Nick the Culprit?

Dongggggg

Turkey Basting craze and how to keep abreast of it.

Donnggggg

Cap'n Cronan back from holiday this week, panic buying of lifejackets in Portsmouth.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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DaveL
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Postby DaveL » Mon Jul 23, 2007 3:03 pm

Donnngggg

DaveL upsets even more people without even tryin'
Manatee Singles
http://www.hotdugong.com

Is it June 2017 yet?
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black bart
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Postby black bart » Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:08 pm

Dongggggg

"Green" Cap'n Smith publishes proof of Global Warming after extensive research:

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The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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walktheplank
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Postby walktheplank » Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:20 pm

Dongggggg

Riot at the Admiral Benbow after Landlord refuses a lockin.

Dongggggg

Dave L spotted cuddling wench and its not Pirgella

Dongggggg

Cap'n Cronan is weird, official

Dongggggg

Black Bart creates another pointless thread, apathy ensues.
The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
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DaveL
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Postby DaveL » Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:27 pm

Donnngggg

Eunice O'Hare scores contract to model new swimsuit range. Brenda outraged.

Donnnngggg

Big Ron unleashes his new big sausage - the M.M.R. (the Mega Meaty Ron)

Donngggg

Piratica Football Club chase transfer deal with Vinnie Jones
Manatee Singles
http://www.hotdugong.com

Is it June 2017 yet?
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black bart
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wig

Postby black bart » Mon Jul 23, 2007 6:32 pm

Donnngggg

UFO Terror alert as Walktheplank's wig blows accross Portsmouth harbour in a storm!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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black bart
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Pipe

Postby black bart » Mon Jul 23, 2007 6:38 pm

Donnngggg

New Fish Head Stew Pipeline to Eastern Europe nears completion:

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The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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OZ_Nick
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Contact OZ_Nick

Postby OZ_Nick » Tue Jul 24, 2007 8:05 pm

Donnngggg

"Oi bort em fair an skware" says Capn Oz_Nick after bein charged with theft of spittoons
----

Ye may knowe mee better as Cap'n Bluenose
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DaveL
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Postby DaveL » Wed Jul 25, 2007 2:39 am

Donnnggggg

Bustlin Brian the Portsmouth plumber wins pipeline contract.
Manatee Singles
http://www.hotdugong.com

Is it June 2017 yet?
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black bart
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Undies

Postby black bart » Wed Jul 25, 2007 4:43 pm

Donnngggg

Pirgella recognises her undies on that washing line and demands to know how "Green" Cap'n Smith got hold of em!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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walktheplank
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Postby walktheplank » Wed Jul 25, 2007 5:25 pm

Donnngggg

Pensioner makes shocking claim that The Black Spot helped her across the Road

Donnngggg

It was either me or the little Pink Dress explains Pirgella announcing her split with Dave L

Donnngggg

Capn'n Cronan spotted sailing up the Solent, Mayor orders the immediate evacuation of Portsmouth
The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
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The Black Spot
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Postby The Black Spot » Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:26 pm

Donnngggg

It's stopped raining in England.

Donnngggg

Oh, it's started again.
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walktheplank
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Postby walktheplank » Thu Jul 26, 2007 4:33 am

Donnngggg

Big Ron announces half price sausage sale.

Donnngggg

Tiddles the cat named as Portsmouth citizen of the year.

Donnngggg

And now for some good news Cap'n Cronan lost at sea
The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
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black bart
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Staff

Postby black bart » Thu Jul 26, 2007 9:38 am

Donnngggg

Simpsons Movie website allows you to create your own Simpsons Avatar

Donnngggg

Staff outing drinking binge shame of British workers:

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The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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black bart
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Beijing

Postby black bart » Thu Jan 17, 2008 10:01 pm

Donnngggg

Captain Cronan flies in from Beijing:

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The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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