da book ove dreedid NefYooBLackBeard

[Ubi Dubius]

NefYoo reliesd he neeedddid noo lollllle. Soo, widdot haskin his temp-mom twistysisty, he toddled to da store wid a corter anna big hat.

[Roy Hunter]

At the store he met a slightly strange, sweaty pirate. The pirate looked around furtively and said "Hello little boy. Would you like to come and look at some baby turtles?"

So Nef Yoo said...

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

...i coman ye ta make me turle soup!
an yoose thee shells loike day be poncy bolws.
but furst ye has ta dry yeseff
i dunt loike so much salt in me soup fank ye yer welkum
not after that tyme unkl farty ...

[black bart]

...'don't ye drag me inta this sordid tale ye little blaggard...I don't know what hincident ye be referin to an I aint nevver made stew wiv turtles in or anyfing else resemblin a livin animal...wiv a body attached to it's head'...said Uncle Farty graspin Nef Yoo BB by the...

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

... pot.
"i wull yoose dis pot fer cookin! fiss hed stoo', roard Unkl Fart

"but dat my chambarr pot " ' i sayd.
an dat remines me wen unkl farty sayd

" pull me fingarr'!...

[Roy Hunter]

...and offered Nef Yoo his prosthetic hand. Nef Yoo pulled Farty's finger, the whole hand came off, and Nef Yoo ran away to try and trade it for lollies.

Now that Unkle Farty had taken Nef Yoo's chamber pot, any time Nef Yoo needed to 'go', he had to use...

[black bart]

...the nearest thing on hand to stem thee flow...and in this case it was...

[PantyGnawer]

the pegleg of captain Cronan's dog named Scurvey. Who was at the time..........

[TwistedSister]

....chasing Nef Yoo's temp Mom Twisty Puss up a tree when....

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

... an den sumwun puld unkl farts fingrr an
oh no ! i thunkid ta me ownsum
but nuffin happin
i dint beer a pioOT
or a BLaaaaaaaaAAAT
or pifff or nufin

BUT DEN ET BE TINKEE !
Fart dun let go a STD !
YUP!

Stealffy Tho Deaffy

"oh no ! tha deaffy tink wull get ye an den ye be suwwy so ye all butter rum !
an den dare be all kinda kryn an skreemin an ...

[Ubi Dubius]

Unky Fart's STD spwead to ta twee wot twisty puss climd. De deff uv Captain Cronin's dog Scurvey wud twadjk an' sad. A wittul wimper, a studder, an'ee stopped movin. Twisty Puss left da twee, tipped 'er hat in 'oner of Scurvey, den chased down NefYoo and whipped widdin an inch uv his lif wid wun hand an' holded her nose wid de udder.

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

...but noooo i sayd
unkl Ubidobido ye muss git yer fax rite .

dis be beddr.,..an den
...An da dreed feersum pirit NeffYOoBLKbeerD
i be so spwry wiff is sailer foots
ee escapd tha wip an sclaimd,

"oh no? i muss git to me shup ?
my croo wull tave me?
unluss day be...

[TwistedSister]

day be all ded beekas Nef Yoo's burday kak was poisened.

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

...but i taved da day wen i sayd
'oh evvy buddee dunt fill ep on kak

ave sum ice creem furst'"

AN evbuddee ave ice creem an sayd
Fank ye Nefyoo fum tavin us fum tha poysun stuff dat
me twiffidsistir tryn git us yucky wiff !'

"Horay fur me " day sayd neYu b heerow!
...an den....

[Roy Hunter]

...they all needed to use the little pirate's room, but Unkle Barty had purloined the only chamber pot.

Fortunately, Nef Yoo has a Jyint Hat, so everyone formed an orderly queue while Nef Yoo held his hat at arms length...