Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Whaaarr be thee soshul pages an' letters to thee Edita? 'As been wintery, wet an' windy down 'ere so bin stayin in port. Oi took thee wench ta thee theater ta see thee new play "Sea Trek - inta Darkness". Thee lads get inta a few foine stouches but theys wear sum funny poncy clothes. Thar shyppes downt looks loike theyd flowt less move as Oi didn't see any sayls. Oi downt know wot contynents they visit coz thars a few native troibes Oi've neva seen! Twas predicktable tale thart wuld 'ave been much betta an' more loively wiv sum 'alf nekkid wenches an' rowdy drinkin scenes. 3/5
Send lawyers, guns and money...
- Roy Hunter
- If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
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Thee Cross Words
Ye
in'
-ey shower o'
-erly useless
!!!






"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian - Cort Report
Cap'n Roy was foined 10 dubloons and 'ad 'is pee-pee smacked wiv a cold spoon for hunsolysitted pinchin thee bums of Madame Fifi's girls. Wen arsked 'ow 'e pleaded, 'e 'ad sayd "Oi pleads insanity Milord... Oi'm crazy abowt 'em!"
Send lawyers, guns and money...
- Nef Yoo BlackBeard
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Deer Erdifter,
Yer curry-spoon-dent misr Gravy Olly dint go ter sea o fillum abowt sea truck - thee owlee mowvie ee witchin wurr this wun
Fank ye, ye welkum.
Dreedit pyrit capn Nef Yoo Bluckbeer (aij 3)
Yer curry-spoon-dent misr Gravy Olly dint go ter sea o fillum abowt sea truck - thee owlee mowvie ee witchin wurr this wun





Fank ye, ye welkum.
Dreedit pyrit capn Nef Yoo Bluckbeer (aij 3)
cabin boy fir hyer. jyint hat no hextra charj.
- Roy Hunter
- If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
PIECES O NINE'S CABIN BUOY 'UNABLE TO PAY' TAILOR'S BILL!!
Shock horror revelations about penury aboard Thee Mad Moggie.
Shock horror revelations about penury aboard Thee Mad Moggie.
Flynn acknowledged his debt in a letter to the agency, saying:
"If you would care to wait about a week longer I will be able to pay your account in full. The only reason it has not been settled previously is inability, not disinclination.
"Yours etc, Errol Flynn."
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
- pieces o'nine
- Look Upon Her Works, Ye Migyt, and Despair!
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
In a prepared statement to thee press, Cap'n pieces o'nine's spokesfeline, Dom "thee Danger" Catte announced:
"Cap'n pieces o'nine and Mr Flynn, whilst remaining close friends, have pursued entirely separate business ventures since Mr. Flynn left thee Mad Moggies Revenge to become an hacktor.
"No questions.
"Thank you."
"Cap'n pieces o'nine and Mr Flynn, whilst remaining close friends, have pursued entirely separate business ventures since Mr. Flynn left thee Mad Moggies Revenge to become an hacktor.
"No questions.
"Thank you."
I will honor Monkey in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens
Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Aye tis well nown 'ow thee scowndrel tutched soft spot in yer 'eart an' otha places. Ye culdn't 'ide 'im b'neath yer skirts fereva.
Send lawyers, guns and money...
- black bart
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Arrr good ol Flynnn...he really knew owe ta get outta payin his bar tab.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
- pieces o'nine
- Look Upon Her Works, Ye Migyt, and Despair!
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Arrrgh, oi lernt from thee beste...
I will honor Monkey in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens
Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Be this still a noospaper? Or 'as it bin bawt by Murdoch? I h'only ask as the articles bin not wot we is used ter.
Grand Deducer Watson of Sherlock. NoName, no pack drill. Astral zone changed five times a day (flexible). Great at manifesting parking spaces by thought control. Hatred of terminology of survivors and commitment to win-win reality.
Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Paid Hadverteyesment
HERE YE!! HERE YE!! HERE YE!!
A Contest hinspyred an' ta be judg'd by thee Sultree Siren o'thee Seven Seize, nun otha than druppy-drawers 'erself, Cap'n pieces o'nine,to makes a despickible new minion fer yerself an' one fer thee Roight Disthhhpickible Black Barrrt.
Oi fownd a mowld for one 'ere:
http://minionslovebananas.com/minion-maker/
...but yer welcum to foind yer own sauce.
Yer downt needs to know what yer doin'... Oi used thee GIMP to nok up theez:


...an' tawt meself a few new curses inta thee bargen figurin' it owt. So lads lettuce see wot yez got... karnt be too 'ard ta match thee professhunal [corf corf] figer'ead he's currantly sportin'.
HERE YE!! HERE YE!! HERE YE!!
A Contest hinspyred an' ta be judg'd by thee Sultree Siren o'thee Seven Seize, nun otha than druppy-drawers 'erself, Cap'n pieces o'nine,to makes a despickible new minion fer yerself an' one fer thee Roight Disthhhpickible Black Barrrt.
Oi fownd a mowld for one 'ere:
http://minionslovebananas.com/minion-maker/
...but yer welcum to foind yer own sauce.
Yer downt needs to know what yer doin'... Oi used thee GIMP to nok up theez:


...an' tawt meself a few new curses inta thee bargen figurin' it owt. So lads lettuce see wot yez got... karnt be too 'ard ta match thee professhunal [corf corf] figer'ead he's currantly sportin'.
Send lawyers, guns and money...
Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
Surprise Win !!
H'in a h'unexpekted result, Ms Elsie Businessboots won the Pirate's H'Apprentice, comprising 250,000 dubloons ter start up a business sellin' cabin boys. No female 'as h'ever wun befoor so this be wun ter wotch.
H'in a h'unexpekted result, Ms Elsie Businessboots won the Pirate's H'Apprentice, comprising 250,000 dubloons ter start up a business sellin' cabin boys. No female 'as h'ever wun befoor so this be wun ter wotch.
Grand Deducer Watson of Sherlock. NoName, no pack drill. Astral zone changed five times a day (flexible). Great at manifesting parking spaces by thought control. Hatred of terminology of survivors and commitment to win-win reality.
- Roy Hunter
- If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
In a statement, Cap'n 'Sir' Alan Molasses said:
Sir Alan Sugar is old enough to be Leah Totton's grandfather. Dirty old bugger.
It were a tough competition, neck and neck I tell ye, but in the end I had to go with the glamourous blonde one with thee nice hooters, arr...
Sir Alan Sugar is old enough to be Leah Totton's grandfather. Dirty old bugger.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
- Nef Yoo BlackBeard
- Tagliatelle Trainee Monk
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
wots hooters mean, unco woy?
cabin boy fir hyer. jyint hat no hextra charj.
- Roy Hunter
- If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
- Posts: 15328
- Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
- Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.
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Re: Portsmouth Guaaaaaarrrrrrrrrdian for yer latest news
It's a type of owl, you little shit.Nef Yoo BlackBeard wrote:wots hooters mean, unco woy?
SEEIN' I SKWIRRILS THREATEN PORTSMOUTH WITH BUBONIC PLAGUE!!?!
It was revealed this morning that skwirrils are carrying bubonic plague, and actually it is not just down to Nef Yoo's diaper. Cap'n Pieces was unavailable for comment. Black Bart is 103.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln
"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)
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